Things to buy for a kodava bride for the wedding
We’ve talked about these things before, but I wanted to add my opinion on them again.
A kodava bride needs to look beautiful at the wedding and in the photos at home. The braid will be her crowning glory for all eternity, so she needs to look great.
Dress with accessories
What she wears on her arm will tell people how she feels in body and mind and they will feel that way too. What she wears on her feet tells people what kind of shoes to wear (and more importantly, how many pairs they need)?
How she holds herself tells people how she behaves in any situation–as a dancer or an entrepeneur or a mother or a friend. She should dress with grace and comfort, Not only because she deserves it but also because it’s important to feel good on your big day!
Matching Wedding Dress
A kodava bride also needs 1-2 nice dresses per side (white + black = a matching set). You can get away with one black dress per side, but I prefer 2 white dresses. Because all guests are invited from different sides of the room. If there are 2 white dresses next to each other, then 1 black dress is going to show up awkwardly next door.
Which can ruin that flow between guests even more than bad lighting would! If you need 3-4 dresses per side, then you had better make sure they are coordinating: two pairs white/black/white/black is going to work best in mealtimes while redhead gold/redhead gold/redhead pink = special occasions!
Additionally you can get away with less dresses if you have 2-3 colors within each color group (i.e., buy multiples of basic colors in your rainbow).
Accessories Like Shoes etc.
4) Bridesmaids need nice accessories (pink shoes with black straps are my personal choice). They should not be just pretty shoes, which can look like clunky bridesmaid shoes; they should be something elegant and sophisticated like this silver pendant bracelet by Engage Me . This bracelet is made from real silver…which means it won’t break easily…and it’s.
Things not to buy for a kodava bride for the wedding
While these are similar to many of the above, they are somewhat different:
A wedding is an occasion to celebrate a relationship, usually between two people. It is also a time that can be highly emotional and stressful. If you want your bride to feel relaxed and happy before the big day, you need to make sure she has everything she needs for her wedding day.
Many things are considered necessary for the wedding process and for keeping things organized and on track. You will find a lot of articles about which items should be included in each category. And which ones should not be included at all. Usually, this is done without any real understanding of what is needed or why it is important in the first place.
This article tries to help with that as well as giving some additional tips on what may go wrong if you skip out on some items or other things that are important for your bride’s happiness on her wedding day.
- Make sure your groom has clean clothes in cases where he will be traveling during the wedding process;
- Keep make-up, hair gel and shampoo away from him;
- If he wants to hang out with friends over coffee or during his bridal shower, don’t give them access to all of your groom’s personal belongings;
- When he arrives in the house for his engagement photo shoot, check his sweat (to see if he has excess body odor or something else that might have happened outside);
- Don’t let him sit by himself near an open window (he may get too hot);
- Don’t give up your friend who takes care of him when you leave for work every morning because you don’t want him stressing about doing it himself (it would break his heart);
Things that are optional
This is not a post about the kodava wedding, but rather a list of things to buy for the kodava bride.
For many people, their wedding is an important event — but it’s one that is most often treated as a sideshow, or as something that doesn’t matter in any meaningful way.
Well-off couples can be overprotective and spend hundreds of thousands of dollars on their weddings; poor ones don’t have the money. This article aims to open a dialogue between rich and poor weddings. Where the bride will be able to buy exactly what she wants without feeling like she has to worry about her middle class bridesmaids buying the same thing for her.
Whether you are planning on having a traditional wedding or something more “out there” like an intimate garden wedding, keep this list handy!
- Bridesmaids: The perfect dress — no matter how much money you can afford. You can go all out with silk, tulle and lace (and yes, it will be very expensive!), but if you don’t want your bride to feel uncomfortable at some point in the evening, invest in a modest cotton chiffon dress that will make sure you look great when your guests arrive!
- Bands: Buy music that fits with your theme and style — if you want someone else to play at your wedding, maybe they would be better suited with a country band or jazz ensemble instead?
- Groomsmen: If you are buying them as part of your gift exchange (or simply because they are friends who love music), make sure they have instruments that they could play at your wedding reception: acoustic guitar , piano , ukulele , banjo , mandolin , etc…
- Bridal gowns: The best kind of dress we recommend here is one in which whatever sex you are (or plan on
Things you can do for free or cheap.
Many of my readers will know that I am currently writing a book on kodava weddings. This is an area where there is a lot of confusion, so I thought I would walk through some of the things you can do for free or for cheap.
1) You can hire a photographer to take your pictures.
This is not a problem. Most places have plenty of photographers who will take your picture for free (and if you pay, typically the picture will be used on their website). If you don’t fancy hiring one, you can look online for photographers who offer to do so. Some photographers are quite good and others quite bad — but most will work with pretty much anywhere.
2) You can hire someone else to do most of the planning (where possible).
There are many guides online which cover how to plan a kodava wedding, although it’s often not clear what kind of planning is involved and how much time each step takes (although this is changing as more and more planners are coming out with their own freelancing services). The best way to plan your wedding is probably by talking it through with at least two people — one being your photographer and another someone who knows what they are doing in the planning area (myself being one example).
3) You can hire someone to help you make decisions about what flowers & decorations to buy.
If you have been particularly stressed by the wedding design process, then this might be good advice for you — but most people won’t need help making decisions about flowers & decorations anyway. Most couples have their own ideas about what they want — so it should not be too difficult for them just about to agree on where they want things placed and when/how they want things done (with some help from others). If that sounds like too much overhead, then maybe hiring someone else will save you some time in the long-run when it comes down to putting everything together!
4) You can buy all your food at farmer’s markets or local produce shops instead of going out specifically looking for markets or shops selling food & drink items made locally.
This has been done before by many different people — including myself! It’s actually great idea if you could choose your own suppliers rather than having them supply everything straight away — but that only works if no-one else in your community specialises in certain kinds of produce and retail food shops cannot get anything made locally.
What you should expect from friends and family?
This is a long, detailed post. Don’t feel like it is necessary to read it all before your wedding, but if you do, please remember to leave a comment. It’s a good way for me to see what you think and can help me improve on the post later.
The idea behind the wedding list in this post is simple: I believe that people won’t buy something unless they have an idea of how much it will cost them in terms of time, energy, money and effort.
To that end, I am going to recommend products and services which are reasonably priced (and will be a little more affordable than buying at wholesale), make sense as gifts for friends and family members, provide easy-to-use service or give them something they can use themselves (something not just given away).
These are things which we don’t need to buy ourselves. I will also give some advice on what to expect from people who do want to be involved in planning the wedding. This part should be pretty basic.
Ask friends and family members if they have any ideas about what you should buy or do for your wedding (e.g., flowers) and get their advice!
A few days ago, I decided to put together a list of things to buy for a kodava bride. I didn’t want to think too hard about it, just pick something and move into the buying process.
The results were both unexpected and enlightening. In fact, it was so surprising and enlightening that I’ll write about it here.
You can find the full article on Medium here .